We're as good at planning ahead as we are at blowing your minds with our jokes. 

We'll put your picture up on the wall with all the other children who belong there. 

And if someone tells you they never have, feel empathy for them before calling shenanigans. 

Megan dozes off a couple of times, so she stayed awake more often than the listeners do!

You need something to listen to while driving to go score some dope for your mom. 

Don't feel too much shame afterward. We tolerate you and your scent. 

The pen is mightier than the sword but only if it's an ink gel. 

He signed us right after Guns 'N Roses and both of us kicked out Izzy Stradlin. 

Do you hear that wind wooshing and the birds chirping? We're opening for you!

Two-thirds of the Slights crew come at you blowing smoke up each other's ass in ways that are unhealthy both physically and psychologically. Kind of like your suitcase. 

The full Slights crew will be back next week. In the meantime, listen to Matt tide you over with his soothing tones (he plays a tape of Al Gore reading Dr. Seuss).

You'll need to be escorted out of the building and someone will have to awkwardly bring you the tupperware you had that disappointing lasagne in. 

Baseball is back to bore you to tears all summer, as is Slights of the Roundtable. Happy April!

It's your classic Slight episode. Now with fake boobs!

It's our centenniel episode! Most of you thought we wouldn't make it this far. Sorry to disappoint.

For the best summary of this episode you should google "Jerry O'Connell Kangaroo Jack."

If God can bring us the lightning so fast, then maybe he's not truly one of us. 

If you got foot problems then look not further than somehwere else. We're not podiatrists. We're podcasters.

Are there some good jokes and bouts of witty banter in this episode? I don't know, is the Pope Catholic? ... maybe?

This is the beginning of a beautiful frienship...and the end of a disappointing romance. 

You know what they say, "If at first you don't succeed try, try to find something else." This is that something else.

Cuddle up next to your favorite sitcom star and listen as we do a podcast version of Sartre's "No Exit."

Jimmie's dying from a new affliction. Michael is mindlessly eating on air. And Matt is flinging Zingers as if they were Twinkies. Eat up!

Isn't it funny that you still know all the words to this podcast because you memorized it in the 5th grade and still think it's hilarious? I didn't think so. 

Kynedee is our beloved late squirrell. She passed on this morning. We honor her memory how we honored her life: with incomprehensible banter and hibernation.

Our top ten jokes of the year are read with aplomb. Also we eat plums.

How many roads must a man walk down before he is called a man? However many roads it takes to induce puberty.

Matt's out on his monthly werewolf prowls, so we picked up a hitchhiker. She tells a good joke and a pretty solid yarn, to boot!

Get all your art supplies for your great art from Blick.

A pleasant discussion with absolutely zero dissenting opinions whatsoever.

It's a scandalous week. We've bribed the higher ups to keep us on the air. So, you know... encourage that type of criminal activity and listen to the podcast.

It's the end of the hard fought campaingn to get Slights of the Roundtable off the air. The bad news is it failed.

Don't forget to fall back. Just make sure you're wearing body armor. Wordplay.

Ever wondered what the benefits of going to a concert under the influence of some magical herbs? Then eat some of this pasta!

An epsiode so funny you'll be squealin' like a pig.

There's one thing to be said about having guests over, which seems to be a bit limiting.

Like "3 Men and A Baby" (Can you guess who the Gutenberg is?), but lazier it's Slight of the Roundtable!

Why won't the the window on this computer roll down?

This episode will make it move.

It's a return to form as the Slight's Crew finds its groove in more ways than one.

In true Slights fashion, this week marks one of the most lowly anticipated podcasting events ever! Get your ear pits ready for the  triumphant return of Matt and Michael! It’s been over a month since the guys left for the Fringe Festival, leaving Jimmie the podcast rains, which he has molested over and over again (which is legal as there is no law prohibiting podcast molestation, even though, as i’m sure Jimmie can attest, is a brutal and twisted from of molestation involving microphones and a whole mess of lube). 

In other words, we’re back. Plug in, hit play and realize the universe has been returned to its normal state of kayos.  

There are no words to describe this episode, however there are songs. No, not those songs. Just click play.

The mold has been broken, and smashed into tiny Jimmie shaped pieces. Pieces that may or may not taste like peanut butter and stink axe body spray. This week on the show, it’s a full on Jimmie Bernardin take over. No one is safe, especially not your dog. Hide your kids, hide your wives, and get your earholes ready for a good old fashioned wet willy of a podcast.  

Although Matt and Michael are gone, the rules still apply. Nonsensical ramblings leading into jokes about the news, with your pants off, followed by God herself (in a gucci tuxedo) working the soundboard, all while juggling live ammunition and pontificating on the nature of the universe. There’s also a gerbil in there somewhere. This week Jimmie is armed with special guests Amelia Zukowski and Drew Keers. They go deep on Olympics, the moon landing, and Michaels tendencies to wear colorful pants. Get weird and click play. 

Listen to the last Slights Podcast EVER! maybe. but probably not

You'll get the look and smell of cotton candy but without the sticky piece of carboard that you have to take on the rollercoasters with you afterward. 

If you remember who Josh Lucas is then you'll probably love this epsisode... you should also think about getting a psychiatrist.

A recent observation: Southern accents didn't exist outside of the South until The Blue Collar Comedy Tour was released.

Drew left a magical button that whisks us off to far off places. Lucky for you it wasn't your home.

Matt and Jimmie have a special guest with them and this time it wasn't at gunpoint. Thank god someone bought them a bowie knife!

Think of it as tortue resistence exercises for the next time you're put in rendition.

What makes a nerd? Outside of making bootleg podcasts in your bedroom, that is.

Remember how your mother always told you that you looked like Tom Cruise? She was lying to Tom Cruise.

If true love were a gift, it would be hastily wrapped in a newspaper.

High up in the Alps lives a man named Steve. He hath brought upon the Earth a plague. This is it.

It's gotta beat Macauly Culkin's 1993 P.O.S., right? We should hope so, or else our bookie is going to go to town on our knees.

Now suitable for both adults and children assuming that both have been lobotomized! 

Officially endorsed by Herman Cain!

Our very own James Bernardin has a new EP out today! Hello Earthlings is his debut album. It can be found on iTunes as well as

Following the collapse of the economy, two things happened that changed our lives forever: 1) Sandwiches no longer tasted good and 2) We banded together to become a superhero trio the likes of which hasn't been seen sinc…

You know what they say, "The quickest way to a man's heart attack is ingested trans fats." A special episode recorded live at Wendy's.

How do you talk to an angel? First things first, don't write her a shitty song.

Time travel and sandiwch making have one thing in common: Jimmy Buffett is integral to both.

How many times must we tell you? The Earth does rotate around a giant tortoise.

In Matt's abscence Jimmie and Michael decided to do the one thing he does best: make lists. Here are our lists for the Top 5 Shitheads, Top 5 Meals, and a Top 5 of our own choosing. Enjoy! This'll make up for th…

It's a very special uncut episode of Slights of the Roundtable and Matt and Michael interview their significant others! Get to the heart of why these gals put up with these neurotic fools. Hint: It's certainly not because they call them gals.

Power Half-Hour.

You ever look in the mirror and realize you have incredibly feminine hips? That's probably what it feels like to date Hugh Jackman.

Remember right before you turned 20 and had that 1/5 life crisis because you haven't done anything of any importance? That's our life.

My mother always told me to be nice to guests. To call them "Sir" or "Madam," or maybe even "Ma'am," but she never told me how to get one of them in the sack. Shame on her.

You know that time in college when you decided to experiment more? This is what would have happened if you kept doing that.

In life there are two things worth living for: financial gain at the emotional expense of others and soup.

If there’s one thing we figured out this week it’s that we will all die in bean bag chair.

Everything you were taught in school was wrong. That's not a rhombus.

Shorts, Death Eaters, making love vs. making whoopee, cigarettes, diabetes, Judi Dench, Bristol Palin, and Judi Dench & Briston Palin are what Jimmie, Michael, and Matt all dreamt about in a shared dream where they c…

Wieners, Weiner, word play, and some good old fashioned disagreement feature heavily in this episode. Babies, bears, and Rick Santorum! It's Episode 11: Keep it to a Seven on Slights of the Roundtable.

Listen in for some jokes and conversation on what it means to be polite in a movie, thoughts on the rapture, and a defense of Dan Gorske, the world record-holder for most Big Macs eaten ina lifetime. It's Episode 9:

It's the weirdest episode yet as Jimmie, Matt, and Michael brings some jokes about Skype, Saturn, and sex addiction. It's Episode 8: Very Irate on Slights of the Roundtable!

Let's be clear. Matt, Michael, and Jimmie are not adults. You're listening to the proof of that. Childish debates and dumb decisions abound this week at the roundtable. It's episode 7: Bunny in Heaven on Slights of the R…

This week Michael, Matt, and Jimmie brew a sweet concoction made up of jokes, introspective talk, and not so introspective talk. Join them as they discuss their personal habits, why royals shouldn't get married in public…

At the Roundtable this week hear Jimmie, Michael, and Matt for some jokes about birds, talk about temping, and way more than you want to know about our sexual pasts. It's Episode 5: Limited Sex Drive on Slights of the Roundtable.

Join Michael, Matt, and Jimmie as they gather to crack wise about online dating, what it's like to be fat, and on the virtues of moisturizing. It's Episode 4: Date du Jour on Slights of the Roundtable!

Have you ever wanted to know exactly how we all feel about facial hair? Then this is the episode you have been waiting for! This week Michael, Matt, and Jimmie bring you some jabs at the Man, mentally handicapped kangaro…

Join Jimmie Bernardin, Michael Blomquist, and Matt Payton bring jokes about super glue, sailors, pigeons, and under age drinking to the Roundtable. Don't forget your sandwich! It's Episode 2: Superhero Glue!

Jimmie Bernardin, Michael Blomquist, and Matt Payton, the knights of tomfoolery bring you some jokes about non-lethal shootings, white criminals, prison, and things that don't involve the penal system. Oh... and excessive gummy bear chewing. It's Episo…